Even the WB logo is green. Oh, we’re back to Neo’s green facial hair. Well that’s not the same Oracle. Why is Morpheus doubting the Oracle? I don’t entirely understand this train station thing. They’re walking on the ceiling. Okay. The eyes of the Oracle? Jesus H. Roosevelt Christ! “I don’t have time for this…

Here’s what I know: Ellen Page, Drew Barrymore, roller derby. Well this takes place in the South. I do love that blue hair! I’m confused. She didn’t win? But she has that giant trophy? Ohhhh, the little sister won one! Blue Bonnet is the best ice cream. For real. Man, Ellen Page was SO YOUNG!…

So Tom is a bit of a con artist, yeah? He certainly doesn’t care that his dad died. So she went to the funeral, but she stayed in the car. This guy is a real piece of work. The implication is that he doesn’t know he has an older brother? “Dad lets me drive it…

Literally all I know about this movie is that it has Chris Evans in it. Holy shit. That was unexpected. Jason Statham? Hmmm. Can the high school science teacher put a smashed phone back together? Probably, in the land of the movies! Baby Chris Evans! Whoa, Jessica Biel, too! How have I not seen this?…

Ugh. “The Weinstein Company.” LOVE the guy checking the distance between his mouth and the microphone. I remember when the King gave that speech on the wireless on Downton Abbey. It’s what finally persuaded Lord Grantham it was okay to get a radio! Henry Higgins made Eliza Dolittle put marbles in her mouth. That’s what’s-his-face!…

That house would be gorgeous if it weren’t so creepy. Do love the weird doors and secret doors. “Part of the family” but not allowed at the funeral? “How old is she?” “We have no idea.” “The boy is literally a Nazi.” lol The piano thing is annoying. Toni Collete is delightful. Obviously, Harlan hired…

Temporal Relocation, lol. …a solution of protons? Energize! Awww, I was hoping it would work on the first try. Michael J Fox??? I didn’t know he was in this! Nice nod to time travel movies. His tie is awesome. “Time travel. Great scott.” Heh, that’s pretty great. Do teenagers actually talk like this? Yeah, inappropriate….

I didn’t know this was a Ron Howard film. Eugene Levy? John Candy? Cool! “Twenty years ago” – heh Wait, what? That escalated quickly. His brother is such a creep. They only looked at each other. Why is she crying? Cherries get a little slime? Ewwwww. Oh. John Candy is the brother? The creep brother….

Alex Winter? I didn’t realize he was in this. And what a mullet! I wonder if Joss pulled Spike’s platinum hair from Kiefer in this. The vampires can fly in this one? Edward Herrman is in this too? And Dianne Wiest is the mom? Why are all of the kids punk? This grandpa guy sounds…